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 Post subject: DORFS
 Post Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 5:05 pm 
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(not sure if this is the right place to put this but... xD)

Some of you may have heard of Dwarf Fortress, and hopefully some of you have even played it. Those that pay any attention to the game's metagame will be aware of the legendary Boatmurdered, a project of running a fortress by saving and passing it along to a new person from a list at the end of every in-game year (when spring arrives). It made for some very entertaining storytelling. You can check the whole thing out just by googling "Boatmurdered". You probably should anyway.

Anyway, my idea was to try and do another Boatmurdered, and I'd need some volunteers to participate who are willing to join in and contribute their creativity (and ability to make screenshots). Now, for those who have never played Dwarf Fortress before, please be advised that it is a viciously difficult and complex game much in the way of a fantasy simulator - like the Sim games, there is no 'win' to the game, except losing as spectacularly as possible. Sometimes in a flood of fiery demons and murder. If you wish to join, please find and download version 0.31.25, which I think is the most recent one (and more importantly the one I'm using now) and play a few games to get the hang of the basics. You will lose horribly during your first few, I almost guarantee it, so feel free to use that as a learning experience and USE GUIDES. I'm not kidding when I say the game is ridiculously complex.

Otherwise, I'll leave this up as a general signup area for people who are interested in joining. Official rules will be posted when we have enough people, but the rules will be pretty general - advice on a few things to not do that will almost assuredly cause you to destroy your fortress during your turn, and how to post up your accounts on the events.

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     Post subject: Re: DORFS
     Post Posted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 5:10 pm 
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    Aaah Dwarf Fortress ... I remember d/ling it once, waiting half a day for the world history to be generated (I was genuinely impressed with the feature and I kid thee not) then spent some other hours trying to figure out how to make my colony multiply. After several hours of play, my dwarves, amazingly, were not yet dead ... but I couldn't really do anything else but forage either.

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     Post subject: Re: DORFS
     Post Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2012 11:58 am 
    E is for Erfworld Supporter Print Book 2 & Draw Book 3 Supporter This user was a Tool before it was cool This user is a Tool! Here for the 10th Anniversary Has collected at least one unit
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    BLANDCorporatio wrote:
    Aaah Dwarf Fortress ... I remember d/ling it once, waiting half a day for the world history to be generated (I was genuinely impressed with the feature and I kid thee not) then spent some other hours trying to figure out how to make my colony multiply. After several hours of play, my dwarves, amazingly, were not yet dead ... but I couldn't really do anything else but forage either.


    Well, your dwarves do multiply... technically. But it's very slow and not controllable, and then you have to wait for the dwarflet to grow up before he starts working... yeah what you probably should be doing early game is building your fortress so everyone can get out of the weather and have workshops to build and renewable food like farms and places to store their stuff. Migrants arrive occasionally in pretty much random numbers and professions, so multiplying naturally is never that important.

    Funny thing though, dwarven procreation. All dwarves are born with beards. The booze running through the mother's systems helps to promote beard growth, and in fact, while fetal alcohol syndrome exists in humans and elves, alcohol serves only to strengthen the Dwarven baby. Plump helmets in particular are known for promoting healthy beard growth. This, in turn, has given rise to the belief that that dwarves just spring out of holes in the ground! Which is, of course, ridiculous.

    Also, mothers hold their baby and carry it everywhere for about a year after its birth, unless they are too sick or unable to. Sometimes, when they go into battle having forgotten a weapon, they will use their baby as a club.

    Dwarves are awesome :I

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     Post subject: Re: DORFS
     Post Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2012 12:11 pm 
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    My favorite sadistic dwarf fortress moment is still the dwarven mom who gave birth while in a fey mood, working on an artifact in the forge room.
    Normally, when a dwarf gives birth, they'll drop what they're doing and pick up their child. But when they're in a fey mood, nothing can interrupt them.

    This dwarven mother-of-the-year cranked out her new offspring and kept hammering that anvil.
    It makes sense, I suppose - dwarves can pop out multiple kids, but they only ever get 1 shot for an artifact in their lifetime.

    So anyway, new baby dwarf immediately starts crawling around the forge room, exploring her environment...

    and proceeds to fall right into the lava that's powering the forge...

    and the baby DROWNS in the lava.

    I have no idea how long I could hold MY breath while immersed in lava, and I hope to never have to find out.

    Dorfs are hard-core.

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     Post subject: Re: DORFS
     Post Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2012 5:07 pm 
    E is for Erfworld Supporter Print Book 2 & Draw Book 3 Supporter This user was a Tool before it was cool This user is a Tool! Here for the 10th Anniversary Has collected at least one unit
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    MarbitChow wrote:
    So anyway, new baby dwarf immediately starts crawling around the forge room, exploring her environment...

    and proceeds to fall right into the lava that's powering the forge...


    Yeah, I seem to remember that the game treats all babies as being 'stark raving mad' at all times. Normally that doesn't matter because their mother is carrying them constantly, but if something happens to force her to let it go (like being in a mood), they will wander around aimlessly and suicidally. Sometimes they even throw up alerts like "Dwarf McBabby cancels action Clean Self: Too Insane."

    So there you go. All dwarf babies are insane the moment they're born. Or maybe, they never really stop being insane, and it's only when their mood finally drops low enough that their composure snaps and they go ballistic...

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     Post subject: Re: DORFS
     Post Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:54 am 
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    I needed an excuse to download DF again, and here it is! I'm game.

    I've had many a bizarre sadistic dorf moment, but my favourite was probably the migrant who entered the map, took one look at what was left of the battered fortress he had set his dorfy heart on joining, and immediately went berserk, resulting in the deaths of all the other migrants and two fisherdwarfs until the militia took him down. I didn't even know it was possible for insanity to occur to a dwarf that had only been in the world for 3 seconds, and I'm not even sure it's supposed to be possible.

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     Post subject: Re: DORFS
     Post Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 3:58 pm 
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    I recall accidentally killing off the mayor (also a named dwarf of the previous owner of the fort during a community/succession game) by using him to plug leaky holes in my waterfall project. Then the player tried to covertly off my dwarf, only to have him live for twenty years or something. I don't recall how I died, but it was something anti-climactic.

    For full reading of the insanity

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